Building Self-Belief for You
and Your Horse
With Self Belief
I went from being told to sell Dolly as I would never ride her again...
to what you see here.
If you believe you can do something. You can!
How Self-Belief Changed Everything
Self-belief overcomes fear.
And fear — more than anything — is what holds us back.
When Dolly came up for sale, I just knew I couldn’t let her go to anyone else. I had to have her.
I didn’t stop to worry about whether I could afford a horse or how I would manage. Fear didn’t come into it. All that mattered was not losing her.
For the first time in my life, I made a plan. I asked questions. I worked out the costs.
And I made it happen — I bought her.
When I told Neil I was buying Dolly, I didn’t doubt myself for a second.
It was the first true decision I’d ever made entirely for me — without asking for permission, without needing anyone else to agree. That was self-belief.
Not loud, not dramatic — just a quiet, unshakeable knowing in my heart that Dolly had to be mine.
Dolly as she was when I bought her.
I didn't realise at the time, but that look said
"I see You"
Why It Matters for Your Horse
Self-belief relaxes your horse.
It creates steadiness, direction, and focus. It gives them something they can trust.
But self-belief can be hard, especially when self-love is missing.
It begins with understanding that you are the right person for you — and that your choices, when they come from your truth, are the right ones for you too.
When you start living in alignment with your values — from the heart — belief begins to grow.
It’s not about being stubborn or “always right.” It’s about being authentic. When you stand in your truth, you begin to trust it. You stop questioning yourself so much. You begin to build real inner strength.
And that strength?
That’s what horses feel.
That’s what makes them settle, connect, and want to follow you — not because you’re dominant, but because you’re clear.
There’s always room to grow. You don’t need to know everything.
But we humans have emotional intelligence too — we just don’t always use it.
Those gut feelings, those quiet inner nudges, are there for a reason. When something doesn’t feel right, it often isn’t.
The more true you are to yourself, the easier it becomes to stand tall in the face of outside pressure — from people, from trainers, from traditions that don’t feel right to you or your horse.
That’s the root of inner strength.
And from that place, you lead with calm focus, quiet certainty, and clarity of purpose.
Horses feel that — and they relax into it.
Often, people do too.
A Gentle Reflection
Where in your life — or your time with your horse — have you ignored your inner knowing?
What would change if you trusted it more?
Try journalling this to see where it takes you.
Consider the decisions you made when thigs went wrong.
Did they come from your heart or from something you were told was right?
Things people tell us may be right for them. but they are not necessarily right for you.
Write about a time you made a decision that felt deeply right, even if others questioned it.
What did it teach you about your own inner strength ?
How might you carry that same energy into your relationship with your horse?
Sign up for Free Site Membership and Access to your Journal
This free journal will allow you quick access on your phone so that you can make notes while you are still at the stable, and everything is fresh in your mind. Create a folder on your phone for any photos you may want to keep for future reference, and enjoy the journey of a calmer happier time with your horse.
How My Coaching Can Help
If you’re struggling with self-doubt, people-pleasing, fear, or the feeling that you’ve lost touch with who you really are — you’re not alone.
These pages have touched on just a few of the emotional blocks we carry, and how they affect not just us, but our horses too.
Through my empowerment coaching, I can help you uncover your true values, and find the courage to stand in your power — gently, but firmly. You’ll learn how your inner world affects your horse, and how to shift from stress and confusion to clarity and calm leadership. Book a free chat to see how I can help.
And if you’re not ready for coaching just yet, start with my course, Horse Listening for Beginners.
Fo rthe price of a saddle fitting, It’s a beautiful first step toward understanding your horse’s mind and building a relationship based on mutual trust, not control.
Let’s start where you are — and grow from there.